After a movie is given a score from 1 to 10 in each category, the points are tallied to produce a total grade from 0-100 that is analogous to a shitty experience, ranging from the vile to the sublime:
- 0-10: Having a bout of explosive diarrhea in a public place
Utterly humiliating. Nothing good can come of this.
- 11-20: Colon cancer accompanied by persistent rectal bleeding
Painful, embarrassing, plus it will eventually kill you.
- 21-30: Severe constipation necessitating multiple enemas
Extremely uncomfortable and potentially quite degrading if you don’t administer your own.
- 31-40: Finding a turd in the upper tank of your toilet
Lame…but it makes for a funny story.
- 41-50: Using a public restroom with no toilet paper and being forced into Macgyver-like improvisation.
Exciting, but ultimately unfulfilling and most-likely resulting in disease.
- 51-60: Changing a poopy diaper on your demented grandmother
Smelly and disturbing, but somebody’s gotta change Grandma.
- 61-70: Changing a babies diaper
Smelly, but we hear raising children is rewarding, so…
- 71-80: Picking up dog shit
This is one of the nastier aspects of owning a dog, but the positive outweighs the negative.
- 81-90: Taking a crap on something you hate
Very satisfying and funny. Although you may lose some self-respect.
- 91-100: A solid, satisfying, wipeless BM in the comfort of your own home